Movie night in America! Yeah!

In this installment in MOVIE NIGHT IN AMERICA we bring you.....The Darkest Hour. 

Which was quite dark and by dark I mean terrible.  They should of called it "The Worst-most-expensive-3D-waste-of-a-movie-ever Hour".  I'd pay to see a movie with that title.  This movie was essentially about two dudes in Moscow, for some reason doing some thing with some phone app that some douche stole.  Yet you don't really know how any of them are connected nor do you give a shit.  They meet two other Americans in Moscow, for some other unknown reason....but hey, does it really matter in a movie such as this?  THEN ALL THE LIGHTS GOT OUT IN DA CLUB.  Oh, and the light aliens show up and start eating people or whatever they were doing to them.  Some crazy psycho dude came up with the idea that a gun of electricity might be able to hurt them.  It ends up being able to knock their electro-shields down so they can be shot...WITH GUNS.  And once they are shot?  THEY EXPLODE.  Seriously, Explode?  Did a 5 year old write this?  The flying squid monsters explode into hardened pieces of rock.  Wow.  Genius.  The only character I felt bad for at any point in this movie was the crazy guy (sort of), but I mostly felt bad for his cat. 

I mean, this mofo had these sweet clubhouse that the electric squid orb fags couldn't see.  He could just chill here and have a good time.  However, he let the american bros in and they immediately had their females FUCK THINGS UP.  Ugh.  They should of followed the random russian chick's advice instead of leading the monster squid back to the clubhouse.  This lead to the crazy guy biting it and having the cat, forced to wear christmas lights, run out of the apartment.  You never hear what happens to the cat.  The cat is the one I felt most bad for.  He had it good.  Living in a safe house, plenty of food, and a dude that sang to him/her.  Miller High Life, thats for sure.  Thats what THAT cat was livin'. 

Terrible.

Hey, at least it was better than Skyline.

I give it 1.2 out of 12 Hamburgers.  The 1.2 was because it had a cat in it and I like cats.